Singer Lee Sang-soon vowed to be careful of his ‘unconscious actions’ to prevent fights with his spouse.
Recently, Lee Sang-soon appeared on the YouTube channel ‘Fairy Jae-hyung’ and talked about his New Year’s resolutions.
On that day, Lee Sang-soon said, “As you get older, there are times when unconscious actions come out,” and added, “However, the actions or words I unconsciously say often become the spark for fights with Lee Hyori.”
In fact, marital disputes often start from a careless remark or a small difference in daily habits. The desire to be respected by a partner promised for life can manifest as disappointment. Through the fights of Lee Sang-soon and Lee Hyori, who are known as a couple that encourages ‘marriage’, we examine the benefits of a healthy married life.
Be Careful of Sudden Outbursts… Gottman’s “Emotional Microaggressions”
Lee Sang-soon stated, “I thought I should not lose my mental grip and always stay awake.” He continued, “Most of the behaviors we dislike in adults also come out unconsciously,” and explained, “They are not acting maliciously, but it often happens because of the way they have lived.”
American psychologist John Gottman revealed in his book The 7 Principles for Making Marriage Work that ‘careless actions’ done habitually without malice or intent can ruin marital relationships. The trivial and automatic responses he mentioned include unconsciously sighing, giving vague answers while looking at a phone, interrupting the other person, and subtly mocking expressions.
If careless actions are repeated, the other person may feel disrespected. In this regard, Gottman warned, “Unintentional emotional microaggressions,” stating, “Especially if dismissive behaviors become habitual, it leads to divorce.”
Importance of Self-Objectivity… If the Couple is Good, Belly Fat Decreases
It is not easy to realize and vow to correct one’s own wrong behaviors like Lee Sang-soon. This is because looking at oneself objectively is a difficult task. Upon hearing this, Jung Jae-hyung praised Lee Sang-soon as a “good adult.” This seems to be one of the secrets to maintaining a good relationship between Lee Sang-soon and Lee Hyori.
Couples who have a good relationship like them also have a positive impact on health. Research shows that the more satisfying the marriage, the lower the obesity rate. According to a study by a research team at the University of California, Los Angeles (UCLA), married individuals with strong emotional support had increased metabolic levels due to the release of oxytocin, known as the ‘love hormone.’
Research leader Dr. Arpana Chertch stated, “Oxytocin acted as a conductor to help maintain a healthy weight between the brain and the gut.”
Emotional Exchange Between Lovers and Couples is Important for Brain Health in Old Age
Having a partner to talk about daily life is especially important in old age. According to a study published in the international journal Gerontology by the Swiss publisher Karger, having a partner or spouse in old age reduces negative emotions and increases positive emotions and bonds.
In particular, research shows that expressing affection or physical contact even in situations with physical limitations, such as frailty, increases life satisfaction. However, if the relationship is unstable or there is a lot of stress, it can have negative effects, so efforts to improve the relationship are necessary.
