Someone approaches and speaks with a smile at a bar. The jokes are natural, and the gaze subtly throws out flirtation. The atmosphere quickly becomes warm, and soon another drink is placed on the table. At that moment, we usually think, "Oh, they are making a move... do they have an interest in me?"
However, research has shown that in this scene of flirting, a brief smile and light jokes may not just be simple expressions of affection, but rather personality signals that reveal how a person forms relationships and their attitude towards others.
A team of psychologists led by Professor Braden Hall at the University of Alabama has published results indicating that the everyday social behavior of flirting reflects individual personality traits and behavioral motivations in a relatively consistent manner, beyond just being a simple dating technique. This study (Dark personality traits are linked to flirting for personal gain) was published in the January issue of the international journal in personality psychology, ⟪Personality and Individual Differences⟫.
The researchers recruited a total of 2,865 participants, organizing them into 955 groups of three, consisting of one main participant and two acquaintances who knew that person well. This research design was utilized to reduce the limitations of self-reported responses and to evaluate flirting behaviors and their motivations more objectively.
Participants were assessed on the frequency and proficiency of flirting behaviors that appeared in various social contexts such as dating situations, workplace environments, parties, restaurants, and bars, while acquaintances evaluated the intentions and motivations behind those behaviors. Simultaneously, the main participants completed psychological assessments measuring various personality traits such as psychopathy, Machiavellianism, and humanistic tendencies.
Even if they approach with a smile, the intention may be stronger for 'free drinks' rather than affection
Analysis revealed that individuals who tend to use flirting as a means for personal gain or resource acquisition scored significantly higher on psychopathy and Machiavellianism.
The high scores on psychopathy and Machiavellianism in this study do not indicate criminal tendencies or mental disorders, but rather suggest a personality tendency that prioritizes goal achievement over empathy and opts for strategic approaches in interpersonal relationships rather than emotional intimacy.
In other words, individuals who frequently use flirting not as an expression of affection but as a means to obtain free drinks, convenience, or situational benefits tend to have stronger inclinations to utilize people for their goals rather than empathizing with others' emotions, and they are more likely to calculate relationships strategically.
This tendency aligns with choosing calculated behaviors to lead situations favorably rather than carefully considering others' reactions or feelings, and the researchers explained that this tendency is statistically associated with using flirting as a social means to gain personal benefits rather than as a signal for relationship formation.
The researchers particularly interpreted that "flirting to obtain free drinks or situational benefits is not just a simple social skill, but may express a personality tendency to objectify others."
In contrast, flirting aimed at dating or relationship formation showed a completely different pattern. Individuals with higher scores in authenticity, openness, and empathy, which are humanistic traits, exhibited a weak but consistent positive correlation with romantic flirting. The researchers explained that this type of flirting functions as a natural social signal for relationship formation rather than manipulating or using the other party.
Professor Braden emphasized, "People flirt in a more consistent manner than one might think, and that behavior is motivated towards specific goals," adding, "When recognizing someone's flirting, it is important to consider where that behavior originates from." This means that one should look at the context and repetitiveness of the behavior rather than interpreting flirting merely as a signal of affection.
Meanwhile, there is also research indicating that the effectiveness of flirting strategies varies depending on gender and the purpose of the relationship. In 2022, researchers from the Norwegian University of Science and Technology published results showing that effective flirting methods differ between men and women. According to this, men's sense of humor and generosity acted as positive signals, and men tended to feel affection when women laughed at their jokes and displayed sexually open attitudes. The researchers explained, "The effectiveness of flirting varies not only by gender but also depending on whether one desires a long-term or short-term relationship."
